


Dead Angel Flying

by siriuslyyellow



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Episode: s04e09 I Know What You Did Last Summer, Episode: s04e10 Heaven and Hell, Gen, Internal Monologue, Written in 2009
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-05
Updated: 2012-04-05
Packaged: 2017-11-03 02:59:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/376351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siriuslyyellow/pseuds/siriuslyyellow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anna flies back to heaven and ponders life.</p>
<p>Challenge: Anna, wind, gritty, hurt, "I don't want to. I have no choice."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dead Angel Flying

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on the LJ community spn_monthlyfic.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It wasn’t her fault that things went down the way they did. In fact, Anna would argue that she did everything she could to avoid this exact outcome. Going to heaven would be a joyous experience for most, but not for her. After all, heaven was the last place she wanted to be. Besides hell, of course.

But as she flew up towards the sky, faster than the wind or even light, she thought to herself that it was not such a bad way to go back. After all, she had known what it was like to be human. For only a brief time, but still, it was more than any other angel could honestly say.

And her time as a human, it had been good. It was dirty, gritty, painful. She had hurt and she had been hurt. But it was also joyous, kind, and sweet. She had loved and she had been loved. It was the most real she had ever felt, and she almost wished that she had never felt it at all, because now, going back to a life of blindly obeying orders, she would mourn her freedom all the more.

Anna felt them before she saw them. Castiel and Uriel. She expected the pair of them to fly right by her, but only Uriel passed without a word. Castiel slowed to her leisurely pace and, surprisingly, tried to comfort her.

“Are you all right?” He wanted to know, but she could hear he was just saying the words with no real meaning behind them. It wasn’t a true question, just a polite one.

She almost laughed, then pointedly replied, “You don’t care.” After a pause she smiled tightly at her fellow angel and clarified, “It’s not your fault. You can’t. You don’t know how to.”

Castiel glanced askew at her. “That’s not always the case.”

Anna briefly smirked but did not reply.

“You may not be welcomed back.” Castiel stated as if he were discussing the weather.

She closed her eyes. “I know.”

Castiel continued without a pause. “So why even try to go back?”

Anna’s eyes hardened. “I don’t want to. I have no choice.”

“Ah,” Castiel nodded, flying ahead of her, “Dean Winchester.”

“And? What about him?” Anna asked after a moment once he did not clarify.

“You would sacrifice your freedom for his.” Castiel waited a beat before adding, “You care for him.”

Anna paused. “So do you.”

Castiel looked back at her. “I thought you said I was incapable of caring.”

“I thought you said you weren’t.”

Anna watched as Castiel, after a moment, pulled even further ahead of her. He shouted back, “I’ll go ahead. Maybe I can get them to accept you back. It would be easier on you if they did.”

Anna nodded. “Thank you.” After a moment, she could no longer see Castiel’s wings.

She could have been there and back already, three times. But she wanted to take it slowly, enjoy the atmosphere. If Castiel couldn’t get her off, she would be forced to do something horrible, such as have her wings ripped off and not be able to fly or leave heaven ever again, and that was the best scenario. The worst was unthinkable, and involved going to the only place that was worse than heaven.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

_fin._


End file.
